Christmas Pot Pie
It’s Christmas Day today. I feel a deep love and also sadness. I reached out yesterday to my 2 sisters and my brother in law to wish them a happy Christmas Eve.
I have been estranged from my younger sister for many years, though we have spoken on and off and until April we could communicate.
I woke to my older sister asking me to unblock the younger as she could’t see my texts only hers.
I told her I don’t have my younger sister blocked.
To be sure I sent the younger an email with a different email and also blocked my caller id. I made a call and it went through but hung up on.
I called again and she picked up with dead air.
I said Merry Christmas to her and she hung up.
Projections still are here, she blames someone and anyone for her life and it appears it’s me.
The timelines are shifting and in 2026 and even now I will no longer reach out. If there is no forgiveness or kindness, there is no point. I accept that now and can and have now let go.
One hopes at Christmas we could meet one another with kindness and love, if only for a moment. I wish her well in my heart.
I won’t carry this weight into the future. She is in another timeline. Sending her off with love. There is no space for this in my life anymore.
Merry Christmas if you celebrate and “Happy Festivus for the rest of us”
I hear your acceptance and I feel your willingness to let go and stop trying, even if the door is cracked open for when she wants to come back.
The pain, the effort, and the resignation are so strong, so clearly put and resonant.
The pain and acceptance are both tangible.